Sometimes, things just fall into place.
As we returned from our first day at the school, we all decided to go see the new Bollywood film, “Sanju.” Unknown to us, Sanjay’s battle with addiction was detailed in the film. I’ll avoid giving away spoilers, but I was fascinated by the amount of love and support Sanju received from his friend and father.
A few days later, we made our first trip to the deaddiction, or rehabilitation, center. Knowing that past teams had tried and failed to get an interview with Dr. JPS Bhatia, we didn’t carry many expectations. However, we were pleasantly surprised when he not only agreed to another meeting, but also let us attend his weekly seminars in which recovering addicts told their stories. These meetings were truly eye-opening and humbling.
The biggest takeaways that I took from these two events are as follows: addiction is a disease, like cancer, and we cannot blame the individual for their behavior change; unfaltering support from family and friends is very important to truly control drug or alcohol addiction.
I have to admit I’ve always carried biases against people who are addicted to drugs or alcohol. Why don’t they just stop? Can’t they see how much they are hurting their families? Can’t they see that they are only hastening their death? But that is not the case, and I cannot stress enough what I have learned here. The questions are not “Why are you doing this? Don’t you care about us?” but instead are, “I understand that you can’t stop. I know that you love us and are hurting yourself by hurting us. How do I help you stop?”
Don’t get me wrong, I understand that it is infinitely more difficult for an individual to do this for a family member or friend. But what I understood from these seminars was that community helps. Talking about mutual struggles helps. So for those of us who know people affected by drug or alcohol addiction, help them find that community. Listen to their concerns. Remind them that they are doing the right thing by supporting their family, that their loved one is still there, they just have to find a way through their addiction. As I saw in Sanju and in the seminars, love is the answer. Through love we understand how a friend or family member can become addicted to drugs or alcohol but still love us. Through love we can help that friend or family member heal.